Yesterday evening sleeping among thousands at the floor of the edified Gurdwara on the rough red rugged carpet providing a subtle protection against the cold white glassed marble placed at the surface so graciously adding to the radiance of the golden tomb, with the pond gleaming subtly the structures luster, I descended to the baby crotch position and nestled up.
The extra pair of shirt, tucked yet preserving its crease under my skull helped to buoy up the pinching from the hard ground courtesies to the law of gravity.
Thoughts inundated the mind and the heart, as to what do I owe this blessings in disguise to? Actually, the point of concern being what made me put myself in this position, that suddenly I don’t have a home nor enough money to live in a hotel.
Perhaps, the phases of life pass quicker than the blink of an eye.
How come I, I am here? Behold the aggrandizement of ego folks, it seemed to have convinced me that I am in some measures special and this perhaps is not the setting I should be associated with. Yet, as to what of these other folks crumbled up to each other like veggies in a stack, what about them said the ego?
The position I lingered on was such next to a pillar providing shade from the glimmering lights, above my head were others folks in their life's own, journey with their feet pointing at my head, next to my face the same epitome awaited of unbidden rugged feet.
There were times during the night wherein I feel into complete ease with my surroundings & dare I say may have envisage to hallucinated the oneness of all souls breathing in oneness, all dreaming some of distant places, some of people, some of miseries & pleasure of the past to be fantasised about in now's future.
Subsequently the tenderness of my lovers sanctuary cast a shield over myself and I loosen my hold of my leather laptop bag, with the sense of care as being at the helm of my lovers fate. As fast as fleeting thoughts are, the sense of belongness vanished within the blink of an eye to the tones of the homogeneous voices of some folks crowding up against a poor chap who may have committed an act of adultery, slapping him twice, and hurling abuses at him.
Dismay at being powerless and that it is apparently is not something I would want to get involved at yet, I forced myself to give in to the pain and shut my eyes, shifted sides towards the unsolicited feet turning my back to the gang bang.
Immediately the sense of fear resorted to its humanly embodiment and predominated the bodily senses to be electrified with the thoughts of fear of the unknown. Oh you crazy mind.
Eyes opened, many times, to watch the infinite stars and sky overtaken by the mist yet clouds shining in orange reflecting its arch nemesis, humans wrong doing to the atmosphere, City light and pollution, Often thoughts came and passed by quick in the moment of not allowing me enough time to objectively question its origins , values & opinions. Perhaps, that is a sure stark sign of a unwary mind, deeper rooted issues in the subconscious level?
Yet the magnificent of all was the morning wake up call. allowing me to comprehend with a swift walk around the pool of nectar, that no power, no pressure decides the fate of my decisions and choices, It the man who does not choose what happens is most unwary, perhaps the man who doesn’t know what he wants shall not be happy with what he gets.
And nothing holds more true to this statement that my own experience of being a squirrel in the middle of the road, look right and left, too soon nowhere to be found but death bed.
My time travelling like a baba sleeping at rather odd places was filled with excitement and adventurous spirit, for I wanted the risk to instil into the very core of my being. The fear of the unknow, provided me with challenges to grow out of my comfort zone, as I choose to do it,
If you fail to choose for yourself you, essentially you just choose to be victim of the minds whose sole purpose lies in influencing susceptible minds and their aspirations to say the least shall not be noble. They are turning myself and many others into as Terence puts it so eloquently, into a half-baked moron consuming all the trash that’s being manufactured out of the bones of a dying world.